Winning Arguments or Winning People?

I just found some facts online that prove my already formed opinion is unquestionably right and your opinion is stupid. This eviscerates any opinion that differs at any level from the one I’ve already formed. I’m offended that you disagree with these facts I’ve found.

(End sarcasm.)

Whether you get your news from traditional sources or social media, you’ve experienced something that sounds similar to that last paragraph. We live in a generation that may not have all the facts, but we do have all the answers. Current circumstances are actually more unfortunate than that. We live in a generation that has the privilege of choosing the “facts” we want to believe.

Mask or no mask? To open or close? Fund or defund? Silence or violence? Whose life matters? The great tragedy of our generation is that we’re more interested in winning arguments than winning people. We’ve given in to the mistaken notion that anyone who disagrees must be my enemy.

Let’s consider that argument for a minute. What if everyone who disagrees with you is your enemy? How should you treat them? Should your enemy be discredited, discriminated against, disgraced or destroyed? Should we divide into sides? How many sides are there and what happens when you find your convictions standing firm in multiple camps? Are elegant, personal solutions even an option within the complexity of our disagreements?

I believe enemies can come together without total devastation. Better yet, enemies can become allies, allies can become friends, and friends can become family. It happens when our priorities change from winning arguments to winning people. An ancient practice can inform our interaction with one another. One proverb says, “If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; if he is thirsty, give him water to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.” Another reminds us, “… Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you … And as you wish others would do to you, do so to them.”

It’s that last sentence that gets me: “… As you wish others would do to you, do so to them.” Online or in-person, wherever you may stand, I hope our discussions will be passionate, informed, considerate and kind. I don’t need an enemy. I need good information. I need a deeper understanding of you and the things you find significant. I hope you’ll be patient to discover those same things about me.

My prayer for this generation is that we would all experience the transformation that comes because Jesus Christ gave His last full measure of devotion, not to defeat me, but to defeat sin and death. May we follow His example and overcome our perceived enemies by the kind of respect that transforms our relationship with one another.